Welcome new and old to the wonderful world of my brain

Well hello there, some of you may have shifted across from my old blog (incredible shrinking me) which ive decided to shut down in order to open this one, i made this decision for a number of reasons, but mainly because of the following 2.

1. random people posting random comments on my blogs that weren't exactly 'right' if you ask me ;) and i just couldnt keep on top of deleting them.

2. i havent exactly been on track lately, well - at all. and when i say lately, i mean for a good few months, so my thinking was new blog, new look, new start. :)

Im going to provided a little bit of background to me at this point, so old readers can feel free to skip :)

My name is Mel and im 23 :) and i've been overweight for pretty much as long as i can remember, not technically true, i was severely underweight until i hit four and a half and i guess im still trying to make up for those years of malnourishment ;) It's taken me a long time to accept my personality as who i am, and not be defined by my weight but im doing that now and loving every second. I guess it would be fair to say i lead somewhat of an alternative life style, which means i adore my tattoo's, piercings and rock music in general. Im also a big nerd, and read a lot - No# 1 book worm - thats me :) i will read anything, from horror to sci-fi to historical, and i pretty much always have a book on the go :) so i guess that explains the title of my blog. im a rock and roll nerd; its also based on a song by the ultimate comedy rock god; Mr Tim Minchin - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2De680f8r-c - im a big Minchin nerd too, as well as a comedy nerd and a film nerd. Im going to see John Bishop live in November and then Russel Howard live in feb next year. I saw Mr Minchin last year, as well as Ed Byrne :)
Im not at all religious, i describe myself as agnostic with severe atheistic tendencies ;) i do however try to keep this out of my blog, not so much on facebook so if you add me on there you have been warned. ;) i love music yet i have no talent, i used to play the drums but broke my wrist and never got back into it, im desperate to learn to play piano but no one will teach me as i they all know how limited my talent is and how frustrated i get, and im poor and i cant pay. lol. I like a lot of different types of music, from greenday and acdc to eminem and plan b :) not to mentioned robbie williams ;) I also dabble in writing, short stories and poems mainly.
I work for the ultimate budget retailer, Poundland, as a till monkey :) - and have done since september - i pretty much love everyone i work with, and have a great giggle - good times :)
This past few years has been rather turbulent for me, i did get down to a low of 20 st 1 but ive gained most of that back and im hitting 24 st again now, not good but im getting back on it so all will be good. So heres my background in as short and concise way as possible;

when i was 18 (after college, history,english language and classical civilisations - such a nerd) i left my northern hometown of sunny st.helens and moved to wonderful woking to be with my partner, i lived there for 2 years and worked for woolworths (rip) then my dad had a grand mal seizure and i decided to move back home as even though he was ok, it really shook me up, me and my partner lived down here until the halloween before my 21st birthday, he worked away in wonderful woking and he travelled down solely to finish with me in the space of 15 mins after he picked me up from work, soo i moved back in with my mum and dad that night and i havent left since, and i really haven't heard from the twunt since, sigh. In the december of the same year my Grandaddy, who was in a caring home as he had severe hallucogenic dementia, had a massive heart attack suddenly on a saturday morning and that was the end of him. This shook me up pretty badly, and it took me a lil while to get back on track with my mentality and the dieting process. At the times i worked for adams childrenswear (do you see where this is going?). Last year i had a week off as booked holidays, on the monday morning i got a phone call saying i had to go go in work as the shop has shut down and we need to empty it out. we found out the shop was closed 10 minutes before trade was due to start. nice. hello redundancy, hello dole line. that was in the january, i was unemployed until the july when i finally got a job. i was bullied severely and i lost myself, luckily i got this job in poundland after 2.5 months of hell and all is good.

i also suffer from medically treated (at the moment, i have spells of being off them) bipolar, which is basically hell on earth for keeping a grip on your emotions. it however does not have to send you off on drug taking tangents like kerry katona would have you believe ;)

I have a total of 4 tattoos (rose on my chest, bee on my shoulder, big celtic star thing on my back and my self designed shooting star on my left hand), i have my ears and navel pierced, i have an 8mm flesh tunnel in each ear (second piercing up) and my lip pierced, and the collection is ever growing :)

so, my play for the next few weeks is simple, oh yes readers from the past - im going in this with a plan this time. i was meant to start pointing this week, however - mother nature decided otherwise and i ended up with tonsillitis, sinusitis and an upper respiratory track infection - on my week off as well, wheres the justification (i was ill when i was younger with some shingles like illness that reduced my immune system right down, i never only get one thing,lol) so - the plan;

1. this week im cutting down on rubbish and portion sizes in general, without worrying too much about eating the right things.

2. starting monday i'll be pointing on paper and generally getting back into the swing of things, i wont be weighing myself as i dont want the added pressure.

3. after a few weeks of that, i'll be going full throttle into scary-mel-diet mode. i've bought a new note book to track in and all will be well, i also have a picture of a colour in monkey on the fridge, once im feeling comfortable in this im going to colour in a square of it each week (ive separated it into 9 squares) and after 9 weeks im gonna see how fat my monkey is :)

i appreciate this has been a very long post, thank you for enduring, and choosing to follow (if you do)

                                                       peace out x