Sunday, 18 May 2014

The tale of the Baldest Shoes In Britain, and Bbq's and Tutus and Stuff. :)

Evening one and all. I hope this blog finds you all well.

I've been up to a fair bit. Firstly, last week I went for a 5k training sesh and noticed as I power walked / small bursts of jogged my way around my little secluded patch of canal I favor for these training sessions (don't worry, I'm never alone) that I was slipping around it a little bit. When I came home I checked my work out/running trainers, and well..this;

Balder than a very bald man on the baldest day of his bald little life. So I decided I really did need to invest in a new pair if I wanted to carry on power walking / jogging without you know, breaking my neck. Which frankly, seeing as every day I do a little jogging burst I'm pretty sure I see the light of the end of the tunnel becoming my closer, I don't need another thing trying to kill me. So I took myself off to JD sports on a very quiet day to purchase some. I chose a quiet midweek midday as to be honest the more people i'm around the more likely I am to have a panic attack, and also because, as an extremely fat girl, I always feel like I shouldn't be allowed in JD. Like I walk in, and I feel like everyone is staring at me and thinking to themselves how I shouldn't be there because a) their clothes won't fit me, and b) I won't be using their sports attire for it's true intended purpose. Even though I totally am. I dunno, am the only one that feels this way? That and let's be honest, JD attracts 'Chavs' like honey does flies, and as I have piercings and dress somewhat alternatively, as does my W who on this particular day was wearing a Cradle of Filth hoodie we tend to draw the wrong kind of attention. We didn't, thank god. Anyway, I went in and bought this little beauties, on sale too; 

Aren't they gorgeous? I couldn't wait to break them in and head out to see if I could beat my time. It was on the friday I went out, and unfortunately I have hay fever. I also have asthma. And the two combined kicked my ass, I called the session off before I even got to my usual little strip. So todays Sunday, and I still haven't been out and done a 5k. I intended on heading out today but then chickened out as I thought there might be kids about and I'd rather not go and struggle to put one foot in front of the other in front of shitty mocking kids. I'm sorry, but I absolutely hate them, and at 26 I can say with hand on heart that at 15 I wouldn't have dared mouth off to adults as kids do now. Shocking. But the other reason I didn't go out was that yesterday the sun was shining, and well one thing you simply have to do on a hot sunny day is; 

Especially when you only bought the bbq the week before and it was just itching to be lit :) It was nice too, But I probably ate too much and drank too much. Back being good today though. And I'll certainly head out this week and hammer out 2 more 5k's. The really good news is that on the 5k I did last monday, baring in mind that I didn't do a 5k for like a week and a half before that one, I broke my time!! I did it in 1 hour 4 minutes and 54 seconds. Which is a full 7 minutes and 6 seconds quicker than my first ever 5k. And it burned me up - I'm warning you now the picture uploaded next may scare small children as in it I am wearing no make up, not even liquid eye liner which is my one make up item I can't cope without. I'm also post quickest 5k to date, and look shockingly like a tomato. Proving that I take the saying 'Ladies Don't Sweat they Go Red' to a whole new extreme.

Brace Yourselves. You have been warned.

Oooooossshhh el caliente!!

But as much as it killed me, I got a real buzz of afterwards. Even though, at times, I was jogging - and my fella was walking next to me!! :-\ 

But you know what? I read a blog this week  (today actually) that anyone reading this blog should check out, I read it and laughed out loud to some parts of - That's it. And it was amazing just how she hits the nail on the head regarding excuses we fatties make up not to exercise, in particular run. 

I find number one to be particularly poignant;

1. People will laugh at me

It's the sad truth that people will laugh at you, and they already do. It's one of the many thing that makes me actually despise people. They have no idea that their 30 seconds of amusement on your behalf could be what contributed to you getting this way to begin with. I know every hurtful comment I got growing up, and still get now, makes me just want to go home and hide under my duvet for days. To wallow in Self Pity, but the truth is - I can't keep doing that. And I won't. I hate people, and if they want to laugh at me, then I'll let them - because normally i'm the one doing laps of certain areas, granted whilst gasping for breath and swearing profusely) whilst they stand there and don't move, and talk to their friends for the full hour I'm there. Fuck 'Em, as my W would say :)

It's also from reading the above blog entry earlier today that, whilst keeping time of my 5k's a positive thing, I shouldn't get bogged down in my fear of coming dead last at the Race For Life in July. If I do, I do. But i've still done it. And hopefully it'll be the first of many. :)

That pretty much wraps me up for tonight, apart from one more thing - My tutu came for the Race For Life - I'm gonna look bitchin' - and because any girl, no mater how old or how fat,deserves to feel like a fairy every once in a while :) .

Peace Out. x x x

Sunday, 11 May 2014

Birthday Binges and Reality Bites.

Firstly, yes I know. It's been a little while since I blogged. But I have an awesome excuse in all fairness;
For part of it it was because I was out hammering out 5k training sessions, I even managed to shave off 6 minutes from my original time. Which is good, seeing as the same day I did this, when I got home there was an envelope lying on my doormat which contained this;

ARGGGGHHHHH!! Words can not explain how badly this terrified me. Suddenly it felt real. Like really really real. In a  few weeks time I will be walking/running (part of it) in front of at least 953 other people! What the hell have I got myself in to? So I thought the best plan to ease my nerves was so to sit and fill out my back sign. And remind me why I have put myself forward for this doing particular run, after only deciding that I wanted to run the day before. This is what I came up with;

And you know what it worked! Cancer is, for lack of better words an absolute C**T! And if I, a massively overweight, ridiculously unfit novice can stand up in this battle and say "F**k You Cancer!", we're not standing for any of your Bull any more. You have hurt too many of our friends and loved ones for us to ignore it, then honestly anyone can. Seriously, If I can do this. You can too!!! And that goes for Race for Life, it also goes for getting fit and making a stand. No matter how hard it is, trust me, you'll feel a helluva lot better once you take the first step on your Journey.
I also got to thinking about things that I need to focus on in order to push past that wall of a barrier I reach (usually around 3.5k) and It's my Mum. Truth is, I've always been close to my Mum, and when she was diagnosed with cancer it was actually a relief because we finally knew what was wrong with her. But even now, 2 years on, she isn't in Remission as the type of cancer she has hides and basically she has to go longer being c-free before she's in remission. And that makes me angry. And that is what I am going to focus on when I'm struggling. How hard people everywhere are fighting and struggling to over come, and I owe it to them to push forward, and earn as much sponsorship money as possible, as every little helps (click the link, thanks -----------> ) I watched my mum go from being a bubble person, to essentially a skeleton who, even 2 years on, requires a wheelchair. And if I can help stop even one family from going through this then I feel I have helped a whole heap. :) :)

I also had to re-do my challenge chart this week as 1) it was getting too easy and 2) I wanted to gear it more towards running,So I did. 

Notice the distinct lack of stars on that atm, thats because it's starting today. And later I'm gonna watch a episode of season 2 of Bates Motel whilst I exercise and do Zombie Run on the spot :) Btw, my fridge is starting to look rather packed with all of these inspirational quotes and challanges I keep setting myself.

But it works. So that make's me happy. :) :)

I'm currently composing a running track list to put on my Ipod. Something that I'm realising is harder done than said. As just because I love a song it doesn't necessarily make it a good song to motivate me to run, longer and further. My current list is full to the brim of a wide variety of music, from Korn to Pink to Imagine Dragons (I'm hooked on the latter right now, and the set up of the songs make for excellent running music - I urge to youtube them if you haven't heard of them, Current fave's are Radioactive and Demons) I even bought myself some snazzy new water resistant headphones designed to clip onto your ears when your run with some of the money I got for my Birthday,


What did I just say? Ahhh yes, my diet and training to pot this week as I celebrated turning 27 on Friday :) 

One birthday in a week is bad enough to stay on track,  but when It was my dear W's on nWednesday too. It was, honestly a disaster, culminating on friday evening when  plenty of drinkie-poo's and, well, this happened; 

I know I KNOW. So so SO bad, but it was a double birthday celebration, and Now i'm back to being a little saint. In fact, i'm going to have to end this post for the simple reason my sausage casserole that has been simmering away in the slow cooker all afternoon is done. Nom.

So on that note, 

Peace out peeps x x x